When I am pregnant, I am fanatic about doing everything I can to ensure the healthiest start in life for my baby. I read every pregnancy book and magazine.  I stop drinking caffeine. I don’t color my hair or take hot baths. I eat the healthiest meals and I take 400 micrograms of the B vitamin folic acid every day. Research has shown 400 micrograms of folic acid taken every day, beginning three months before pregnancy and during pregnancy, will reduce the chances of having a child with a neural tube defect, like spina bifida, by 50-70 percent. In my case, it didn’t.

At 19 weeks of my second pregnancy, my husband Andy and I were excited because we were having an ultrasound to learn the sex of our second child. We never imagined the test would reveal anything more dramatic. We were told our baby would be born with spina bifida. (Spina bifida occurs when the neural tube that protects the spinal cord does not close properly. This is typically by the 29^th day of the pregnancy. Affected children have varying degrees of lower body paralysis and bladder and bowel problems, among other side effects.)

My first thought when I heard the news was “This is my fault.” I was taking folic acid, however at the time I got pregnant, I had just lost my job. My world was turned upside down and I was not in a routine. I think I forgot to take my vitamin for a few days.

Every doctor I have talked with has told me missing a few doses probably would not have made a difference in the health of my baby. Regardless, it would have made a difference in my emotional state.

See, I wish that I definitely knew I had taken at least 400 micrograms of folic acid every day. Then I would know I had done everything I could to bring the healthiest baby into this world. As it stands now, I will always feel a guilt I would never want any other woman to feel.

That is why it is so important for any woman of childbearing years, whether intending to get pregnant or not, to take a daily vitamin fortified with folic acid. In Arkansas, the March of Dimes has conducted studies that show 75 percent of women in childbearing years know about folic acid, but only 31 percent take it daily. I hope those women who don’t take the supplement never hear the same words from their ultrasound technician that I did.

I’ll be honest. There was a great deal of mourning after I was told the news. I had to realize that my daughter may never be able to walk, have children, or live on her own. But I was reminded by my father-in-law that Helen Keller faced numerous challenges too, and look how many people she inspired.

My second daughter, Katie, was born Dec. 26, 2001. She is now 16 months old and does have movement in her legs. We have hope that she will walk one day, but she will likely need some help in doing so. She has numerous other medical side effects and spends a great deal of time at doctors offices and at therapy.

Do I wish she did not have spina bifida and could run and play like other toddlers? Yes. But would I change who she is? No. She is beautiful and perfect in every way to me. She has been such a blessing to our family. God chose Andy and I to take care of this special child for a reason.  Maybe it’s so I would write this column.

Julie Mayberry is a former Arkansas television news anchor. She and her husband Andy are also publishers of two newspapers, The East Ender and The Spirit of Saline County.